covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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