i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
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