I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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