Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
Randomize
