Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
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