just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
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