Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
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