are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
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