I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
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