have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
he's single and there are thong briefs.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
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