Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
You’re a genius! I just walked in, shut the door, blew him and left. He could barely move afterwards and was a hot mess at the presentation. He already sent me a calendar invite for another meeting
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