Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
Randomize
