I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Randomize
