Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
Apparently last night I sat at the bar with an upside down sharpie lightning bolt on my forehead, yelling "It's Harry Potter's birthday! Let me be on the qudditch team!" And I kept calling the bartender Dobby. There are videos.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
Randomize
