it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
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