We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
I had to cum in my sink.
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