Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
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