So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize
