you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
Randomize