Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
it was like eating out sand paper
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
