this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
I need a burrito and a hug.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
Randomize