I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
If I die, sorry about rent.
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
Randomize
