When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
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