do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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