Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
