Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Randomize
