I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
And then my night got REAL pukey
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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