Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
Randomize