I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
Randomize
