I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
Randomize
