Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Randomize
