there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
Randomize
