You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
Randomize
