And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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