yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
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