when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
Randomize
