The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
Randomize
