She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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