nutella sex= disaster
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
Randomize
