I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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