Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I think i peed on brittanys purse
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
