This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
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