She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
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