just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
Randomize
