I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
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