Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
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