And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
