I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Randomize
