He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
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