Happy hour is for amateurs. Been drunk since 1230. Fell asleep in a disney viewing of UP. Went to the roosevelt and drank more. Now im stumbling around the grove.
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
Randomize