State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
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